Category Archives for "parenting"
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Have you ever heard the saying, ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup?’ I’m here to tell you that I think that is BS. If you are a mother, you can pour from an empty cup. You HAVE to pour from an empty cup because sometimes you ARE an empty cup!
I’ve recently put this to the test. My five month old daughter was hospitalized for RSV. It was the most stressful week of my life. I got a total of 5 hours of sleep in 3 days. (Not an exaggeration.) I hardly ate or drank anything the entire time we were in the hospital because I was there by myself most of the time. I handled almost everything alone. My cup was empty, I was empty. But somehow, I kept pouring. Every little thing my daughter needed I was there. I was alert. Delirious, but alert. I never let her see how tired and beat down I was.
As I sat there in the hospital bed with my baby girl, covered in her vomit and mucus, all I could think was how I would do anything in the world to keep her safe. How even though, I feel I have nothing to give, I would still give everything I could to her. My body was so tired from no sleep, and sharing a hospital bed with my baby, but if she wanted to be held, I held her. If she wanted to nurse, I nursed her. If she wanted to play, I played with her. I have no idea how I was able to do this. No idea how I didn’t just pass out on the floor and die. I really thought I was going too.
This is why moms are superheroes. We defy the odds. We go against the laws of nature. If it comes down to it, we don’t need sleep. Moms don’t need to eat. We don’t need to shower. A mother will do WHATEVER it takes to keep our little ones safe. Even if that means giving more than we have to give.
I know, I know, when given the opportunity we need to take care of ourselves. But in a situation like this, there was no taking care of myself, and somehow I still was able to give. I hit rock bottom, then kept digging. Because I am a mom. I’ll never stop. I’ll never quit. I will drink a cup of nasty hospital coffee and force myself to squeeze a drop of something into my “cup”.
When God created women he put something in our hearts that activates when we become a mother. Something that kicks in when our children need us. He created us to be able to give when we have nothing. I can’t tell you how it works. I can’t give you advice on how to keep on giving. It’s just something inside of us that happens. Most of all it happens when you love someone more than you love yourself.
This is why I believe you CAN pour from an empty cup.
Have you ever been in a situation like this? Have you ever felt like an empty cup? Let me know in the comments!
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In my house, I like to think that we really try to not curse around our children. We fail epically but at least we “try” right?
My two year old son is like a mocking bird. He acts like he’s not listening but he is. You will say something, and then a few hours later he is repeating exactly what you said. Maybe this is a trait that will help him later in life, who knows. For now, it’s bad because every time you slip he is listening, just waiting for his opportunity to make you feel like a bad parent.
One day, my sister-in-law and I were sitting in the living room while my son was playing on my phone. ( I know, another great parenting moment.) We were in the middle of a very serious conversation, I’m sure, when my dog decides she needs to go outside. My sister-in-law hops up and opens the door, my pain in the butt dog runs outside then runs right back inside. She really is obnoxious, I mean it takes a lot of energy to stand up and let a dog outside right?
We continue our conversation and about two minutes later my dog is at the door barking again, wanting to go outside. My SIL jumps up and yells, “Rugar, what the F!” She really did just say F.
Then my son, who hasn’t said a word in half an hour, even when we were talking to him looks up and yells, “Rugar, What the F*&@!!” He DID NOT just say F!
I turned away from my son laughing so hard that I almost peed my pants. (yes, another great parenting moment.) We really did try to hide our laughter, but I just couldn’t. After several minutes, I was able to compose myself and explain to him that the F word is a bad word.
It’s then when you really feel like a great mom. Where did he hear that? Do I really say that word around him often? I really try not too! He probably heard it from someone else. I’ll go with that because It makes me feel better about myself. Also, it’s extremely embarrassing. What if we were at church? What if we were at play group? What would other moms think of me?! Thankfully it was my sister in law who was there, who wasn’t judging me…out loud anyway.
Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever slipped and your child repeated it at the worst time? Tell me in the comments!
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Teething And Breastfeeding
My daughter is 4 months old and decided to get two bottom teeth at the same time. It is a fun little milestone, “Oh, my baby got her first tooth!” But it’s not very fun when you are a nursing mother.
I exclusively nurse my daughter. She hardly ever takes a bottle, which didn’t bother me a bit. That is, until she got her first teeth. Those little razor sharp teeth of death erupted over night and they HURT SO BAD.
I swear, either she is trying to show me that she is in charge or she thinks my boob is a big hunk of the juiciest steak. She likes to sink those little teeth right into my nipple and she isn’t satisfied until I’m screaming out in pain! Then she looks up and smiles at me with those big, beautiful eyes, like she knew she was causing me pain but she doesn’t care.
I now have the fear that every time my little one latches on it will be the last time I ever see my nipple attached to my body. When my boobs see my daughter coming for them, they automatically invert and hide behind my spine.
I put a teether in my baby’s mouth and she grabs it and throws it as far away from herself as she can. I think she really prefers the taste of flesh. She constantly keeps her fist in her mouth; how she doesn’t bite herself into a bloody mess is beyond me. If it’s not her fist, she wants me in her mouth. I must have boobs of the gods, they soothe the pain, relax, and fill the belly. I just wish she would understand, biting mommy’s god-like boobies isn’t nice.
This is just another thing that makes women so badass. We can handle so much pain that most men don’t even know about. Does it stop us from breastfeeding? No way. It’s just pain. If she bites my nipple off, oh well, I’ll grow another one. I think that’s how it works.
Have you ever fed a teething baby? Tell me your stories!
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I completely suck at being a “house wife.” I believe I take pretty good care of my children but I suck at the whole “keep your house clean” thing.
If you look at my personal Pinterest boards, I have about 5,463 pins on things like, How to keep your house spotless and DIY Cleaners that are good for the environment, but let’s be real. Who the F has time for that?? Why spend five hours making these cleaners that apparently will make your house smell like you fart butterflies, when you could spend that time asleep, or watching family feud?
About an hour before my husband comes home from work everyday, I run around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to clean up. I hate cleaning. I run to do the dishes and notice we are out of dishwasher detergent. Son of A F&$# B*%$!!
There is no way in hell I am taking my children to the store. So I decide to look on Pinterest! There has got to be some way I can make some sort of DIY detergent.
Yes there are 11,000 freaking ways to make homemade dishwasher detergents. I start scrolling and noticed I am being sucked in by the power of Pinterest. There must be some secret code written into these pins that hypnotize you. Why make a simple one time dishwasher detergent when you could make 100 eco friendly detergent tabs that smell like lemons and lavender. Yes Pinterest, you are right. I need to make those, what was I thinking? I totally have time for that.
I find one I like, it has a pretty picture. Ok, ingredients, washing soda. WTF is washing soda?? It’s probably baking soda. Google, is washing soda and baking soda the same thing? No. But you can make washing soda by baking baking soda for an hour. Baking baking soda, are you kidding me?
What else do I need, silicone molds. Oh ok let me just pull those out. Who the hell has washing soda and silicone molds handy at all times? Who am I, Martha freakin’ Stewart?
Next, I do the only thing any married woman with kids would do, I call my mom. Mom do you have any washing soda and silicone molds? Uh, what’s that? I don’t know, it sounds like something old people should have on hand. No, I don’t think so. Crap.
Ok, back to Pinterest to find an easier way to make a quick detergent. I find one that instructs you to use two tablespoons of baking soda, and one teaspoon of dawn and run dishwasher as normal. Perfect I have those ingredients, let’s try it. I start the dishwasher then think, wait won’t the dawn make it all sudsy in here?
Text husband: We were out of dishwasher soap so I made some DIY stuff from Pinterest. I hope it doesn’t get messy. Haha.
He probably thinks, Why the hell did I marry this crazy lady?
It didn’t get messy. It actually kind of worked. I’m not going to lie I really want to make those homemade soaps. I probably won’t, but I want too. Maybe after a bottle of wine I’ll be inspired!
Are you a Pinterest DIY-er? Have you ever had any epic fails? Tell me in the comments!
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In my life as a Mom of two I end up cleaning up a lot of poop. I’m talking A LOT OF POOP. Whether it be my two year old pooping in his room, or my 4 month old blowing out her diaper. It’s poop all day every day. I decided to share how to handle this situation, the way a perfect mom would.
Okay, or at least how I would.
Let’s say your two year old just pooped all over his toys and the carpet in his bedroom. Here is how to clean it up in 10 easy steps.
Step 1: Grab a wine glass, fill that wine glass, take a large drink.
Step 2: Grab a ton of paper towels, every cleaner you can find, and a plastic bag.
Step 3: Take another very large drink of wine
Step 4: Using paper towels grab all solid poopie that you can and insert into plastic bag.
(You may use gloves if you have any)
Step 5: Grab all toys covered in poo that do not need to be saved and insert into plastic bag.
(For me this is all of the toys- none of them are worth saving)
Step 6: Tie plastic bag, and sneak out of the house like you are smuggling 122 lbs of cocaine across the Mexican border. Insert bag into outside dumpster.
I repeat DO NOT GET CAUGHT!
Step 7: Wash hands, gag, and pour more wine.
Step 8: Spray whatever cleaner you have and half ass attempt to scrub poopie out of the carpet. Cover with a towel to “soak” then spray Febreze to cover the stench.
Step 9: Call husband to clean the rest. Tell him you tried your best but you just need him. It’ll make him feel wanted and needed.
Step 10: Finish that wine, you deserve it.
A few extra tips: Remove Children from the room where the pooping happened. You don’t want to walk in on the two year old drawing a poop mustache on the baby.
That, my friends, is how to clean poopie out of your child’s room in 10 easy steps.
Thank you for reading! Do you have any poop horror stories? Let me know below!
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