Motherhood is Messy

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Being a mother is the greatest job in the world. It is also one of the messiest. It starts from the moment that tiny, little baby is pulled from your body. The doctor holds the baby up for you to see. You are overwhelmed with a sense of love and all of the sudden there is pee squirting you in the face.

There is a joke in my family that the first time your baby pees on you it means that you are being initiated into parenthood. Little do you know that getting peed on once will turn into getting peed on at least once a day for the next 18 years. (I’m assuming- because my son is two and potty trained and he still somehow manages to get pee on me.) It’s not only pee, babies poop A LOT. Not cute, little poops that you imagine would come from a tiny, little angel. They are mustard yellow poops that spray out like a machine gun and stain your walls.

Besides being covered in poop, pee, and boogers, you will probably be covered in some of your child’s food. Whether it be breast milk from your leaking tatas or disgusting diarrhea green, pureed peas, it will somehow end up on your shirt, in your hair, in your shoes, or up your nose. Therefor, you will constantly be walking around smelling like some sort of old food.

Now aside from things that your child can cover you in, let’s talk about how messy your child can make your house. I mean holy hell, have you seen a toddler’s bedroom? Toys cover the ground forming a giant stuffed animal mountain that could probably protect you from a nuclear blast. Spilled bags of cheerios are covering the floor just inviting the mice to come have a sleep over, and there is a boobie trap of Legos blocking you from entering the stuffed animal bunker.

 

Somehow you have to do eight loads of laundry a day, just to be able to cross your living room. Doing the dishes twice a day is nowhere near enough. So they cover the counters, the tables, the floors, for some god-forsaken reason there are bowls behind the couch. Seriously though, why?

At the end of the day, you finally have the choice to go to sleep or wash that disgusting baby food off yourself and clean up the house. Naturally you choose sleep. Who cares if it’s a dirty house? Who cares if you smell like you were rolling in garbage? I don’t care. I won’t judge you.

In conclusion, yes, Motherhood is messy, but it’s worth it.

Is your house a mess? Or are you a magical creature who can constantly keep her home clean? Tell me in the comments!

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23 thoughts on “Motherhood is Messy”

  1. Yep! My husband is a neat freak and I warned him our home would never look the same! Now he’s jokingly threatened grandparents who want to buy big plastic toys for our girl. But hey, at least she stays entertained!

  2. It certainly is messy! I do have days where it feels like a magical creature came and cleaned (usually before someone comes for a visit), but most of the time it is a huge mess. My son told me this morning that he had an idea for a contest where he cleans his room and earns a blueberry muffin! LOL I told him that was a great idea!

  3. I have a play area which is a huge help in keeping the house clean! When we didn’t have one there were toys everywhere.

  4. I have 1 baby who is 9 months old and my house is always messy! I don’t want to see what it looks like when there are more of them lol

  5. Yep. Mine are 14 & 10 now and the mess progresses as they get older. Their rooms are like the Bog of Eternal Stench, I never go in there.

    When they were toddlers I trained them to tidy up to music. Whenever they heard the William Tell Overture they had to run around like lunatics and pick up toys like crazy. Worked a treat and meant I got wine earlier. Good luck!

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